Affirmations 080822

This was originally written on August 22, 2008:

080822

I don't want to be an asshole.
I want to be a nice person.
I want to be a person people respect,
But I don't want to care whether they respect me or not.
I want to be in control of my emotions,
But I want them to live.
I want to KNOW that this world is my world, too.
I don't want to live by other people's standards.
I want to enjoy myself no matter what.
I want to love myself no matter what.
I do not want to live by other people's standards.
I want to be free from emotional addiction.
I want to be able to help people no matter what their problem.
I think I want to expand the minds, the hearts, and the strength of men.
I want to feel like I appreciate and enjoy my things.
I do not want to deny the reality of my thoughts.
I do not want to care about who someone thinks I am.
I do not want to care that they know a me that might
Be different than the me I am now.
I do not want to be lazy.
I do not want to procrastinate.
I want to be loving and understanding of myself.
I do not want to hurt myself.
I want to know and understand and feel the reality of the things I discover.
I want to live a life, but it doesn't really matter.
I want to help people in all the ways that nobody could help me.
I want to show people their own existence.
I do not want my objectives in any matter to be
To throw it in the face of someone.
I don't want to remember things based on what they felt like afterward.
I want to know that it's okay to not know the meaning or purpose
Of my life and OF life.
I want to not be so fargone.
I want this thing to help someone,
And I don't want me writing it to be my ego.
I don't want to become egotistical when I think about egotism.
I want to feel like I am loved.
I don't want to want to feel like I am loved.
If I am loved, I want to feel like I appreciate it,
Like I want to feel when I'm longing for love.
I want to live the true life.
I want to feel no obligation to be affected by something that
Other people are affected by.
I want to feel and know my existence and my love for myself at all times.
I want to love my world.
I don't want to care about status.
I don't want to care about impressing girls.
I don't want to care about impressing the woman of my dreams.
I don't want to have to ask people questions to know what's bothering them.
I don't want to cater to people's emotions.
I will not be anybody's entertainment.
I don't want to feel bad when I'm not entertaining to someone.
I don't want girls to like me only when I'm pissed and I hate them.
I don't want to pursue a woman just to have sex with her so I can
Feel cool for a couple days but know underneath that nobody gives a shit,
Including me.
If I have sex with another woman I want it to be making love.
I want to be able to show men that getting laid is overrated,
And that they don't have to prove their value by getting laid.